Because I was never one but wanted desperately to be, these creatures will always fascinate me.

If you know anything about the words "blog" and "Iraq" then you most likely know of Where is Raed? by Salam Pax and turningtables by US Army Sergeant Sean. Such incognito blogging from the theater of war has filled some of the vast gaps in the Rashomon scenario created by CNN and Al-Jazeera. Unfortunately, maintaining a handle on the breadth and the depth of everything takes more time than one has if one also needs to live one's life. Not that I would know but being on the battleground probably focuses the mind in a way that our constantly distracted, option rich and relatively secure existences can never hope to. This is also the context for our media options such as they are. My "involvement" with the war is arguably pretty much on the periphery of my existential territories despite the strong reactions that the accounts of and about the war might invoke within me. Often these reactions have more to do with the place that I see for myself in the world that I inhabit than with the "reality" in that far-off land.

I am as frustrated with our media as the next person but also wonder if the problem isn't more with me not being inclined to venture out of my world. Am I not the one limiting the context of the information that I consume? Lori Van Auken, one of the four September 11 widows whose persistent questions and efforts helped the establishment of the independent commission to investigate what our government knew before and after the attacks, put it this way:

I was raising my children. I was taking care of my house. I was a freelance graphic artist. I was taking care of my things. I didn't understand that I needed to look at the bigger picture. And since September 11th, I've had much more time to look at the bigger picture.

When asked if he'd leave Iraq to live in a place where life would be easier, Salam Pax, who in all likelihood was educated in the West, replied:

No, no, no. You know, (your) country is going though this period where excellent, beautiful, wonderful things are going to happen and you just have to wait and you want to be part of this - you just want to be part of rebuilding your country because in the future you'll just feel that you contributed.

Commenting on the gap between those who have and have not served in the military or between those who have or have not been in combat, Sergeant Sean, who is a non-combat soldier, said:

Are you kidding? There is a huge gap in understanding just between non-combat related MOS's [military occupational specialists] like my job and the infantrymen. I have no idea what they go through but on the same level I can quite easily imagine. I could not even begin to presume that some members of our administration have any idea what it is like for real soldiers. These are the types of things that you have to experience before you could ever understand. Reading or speaking with veterans helps but it is not the same. The unending tedium of everyday is like nothing any normal civilian could ever imagine because most would just quit long before it really even got rough. Soldiers definitely learn what they are made of in crazy situations. Just how far your body can go and what you really need to get by. Learning these things firsthand makes the rest of your life gravy. You learn to take nothing for granted.

I think I'm beginning to understand what makes these kids smart. They've embraced the different worlds that they inhabit and don't seem averse to crossing into unknown ones. This probably renders them unable to get comfortable with a single context...OK, you got me, I'm trying to project, it's all about me...this is supposed to be a journal ain't it? If that's not a good enough excuse for my indulgence then how about this: They get to be smart while they're still kids and I have to work at it in my old (middle) age, hrrrumph!

--aslam

2:55:11 PM